


For The Record, I Don't Think People Are Going To Adopt Puppies Because Of Questionably Attractive Guys In Lingerie

by AsagiStilinski



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: 12 Days of Sterek, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fae, Crossdressing, Fae & Fairies, Fae Stiles Stilinski, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Lingerie, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski in Panties
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:22:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21755218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: Also known as: Stiles Stilinski is Pissed™ that he got roped into doing a lingerie fashion show for charity and everyone is prettier than he isOr atleast, that's what he thinks
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Comments: 9
Kudos: 585
Collections: 12 Days of Sterek





	For The Record, I Don't Think People Are Going To Adopt Puppies Because Of Questionably Attractive Guys In Lingerie

**Author's Note:**

> Day two of 12 Days Of Sterek ~~let's play Guess Those Cameos~~

"You know just for the record, I don't think people are going to adopt puppies because of questionably attractive guys in lingerie,"

The way Lydia was staring at him told him _exactly_ what her opinion was on that

And it wasn't good

"Ok, you, as a fellow bisexual, ought to know that the men I have lined up for this event are _far_ from 'questionably' attractive, and people will do anything for hot guys and pretty girls,"

"Ok the girls I'm not questioning, and hell, even MOST of the guys, but Lydia, you are forgetting one big glaring flaw in your plan,"

"And that is?"

"ME!!"

Stiles Stilinski was not an attractive man

Atleast... not in his own opinion

Pale as mayonnaise and blotched with moles, with no muscle mass and a figure that wasn't exactly lean but wasn't exactly curvy either, he was long and lanky and generally just not someone people would want to see in a thong

Lydia herself had once said his fingers were "so long and bony" that they reminded her of "alien fingers"

Sure she had been hopped up on pain killers after getting her wisdom teeth removed at the time but the point still stood!

People were always at their most honest when on pain killers!!

Stiles was not only going to embarrass himself to death, but in a far more concerning turn of events, he was also going to end up getting a bunch of puppies not adopted, because people were going to leave the show early because of him

God he hated his life

"Stiles, give yourself some credit, you're literally a _faery_ , you can't really think that you're _that_ unattractive,"

Just as she spoke, the other four faery men she had hired for this event- who she knew through a "freind of a freind of a freind" situation- walked up to the counter

"Excuse me, I need a size bigger in the pumps?"

That was Attractive Faery #1- A nicely muscled man with an undercut, a square jaw, and a face that could have been chiseled out of stone

He was the _least_ attractive of the four

"And I can't get these boots laced right,"

That was Attractive Faery #2- A short blonde with hair down to his ass, green eyes like emeralds, and who's body was so fucking slim gorgeous, and soft, that Stiles wanted to ask him if he was airbrushed

"Oh wile we're asking for things! Do you have the teddy in gold? Silver's not really my color~"

An ironic statement coming from Attractive Faery #3- A six foot tall god with long silver hair in a high ponytail and eyes bluer than the fucking sky, his figure somewhere caught between slender and muscular, with legs so long that Stiles finally understood that "legs that go on for days" sentiment- and that was _without_ the heels

"Ah.. I hate to bother but I need a size bigger in the panties... th-they're a bit small on me..."

And finally, the most beautifull of them all, the one that made Stiles question what goblin family he had been born into that just _called_ themselves faeries- Attractive Faery #4, who had slicked back midnight hair, coffee brown eyes, and a perfectly proportioned figure that balanced delicately between slender and curvy, with thighs that Stiles wanted to be choked to death by and an ass that made Stiles want to cry, but worst of all? His _fucking_ personality

The guy could flip on a dime between being so shy and soft-spoken that he made Stiles want to just reach out and give him a hug..... and so crushingly dominant and confident that Stiles felt all of the air leave his lungs just by looking into his eyes

Fucking _faeries_

"I think Allison would be better equipped to help you with this gentlemen, although... Yuri, the panties are _supposed_ to be tight like that,"

The one who Stiles kinda wanted to step on him turned almost as red as his lingerie, and the silver-haired god next to him laughed pleasantly and started dragging him away

"THAT?" he hissed, pointing after the quad squad as they sauntered away, staring into Lydia's eyes as if she were crazy

She _was_ crazy, that much had been left abundantly clear

"I'm supposed to walk out after THAT?"

"Don't be silly Stiles, you're supposed to walk out _before_ that," she explained

Stiles deadpanned

He stared at Lydia as if she had just slapped him in the face with a giant fish

He was unimpressed, annoyed, and didn't know how he was supposed to deal with this shit

And just as he was getting ready to express that to her, he noticed out of the corner of his eye as the blonde faery started stretching, even bending down to touch his toes

.....

Stiles wanted to blind himself just so he could officially say that that was the last thing he had ever seen

"I hate you and everything you stand for...."

"Yes yes, just go put the corset on,"

~+~

Stiles really wasn't what he would call "confident in his body", he wouldn't really say that he _hated_ his body or anything dramatic like that, but he certainly didn't like it

He wouldn't even take off his shirt in the locker room when he was in highschool because he was surrounded by beautifull guys and felt like too much of a blob in comparison

So how Lydia and Scott had managed to convince him to go through with this insanity.... he really wasn't sure

Actually, no, scratch that, he knew _exactly_ how they had managed to convince him to go through with this shit

It was because Lydia Martin was a strawberry-blonde _goddess_ and Scott McCall had practically personally invented puppy-dog eyes

Apart, Stiles could barely resist them, but together?

Death on a fucking platter

And that, folks, was how he had ended up in the changing room at Lydia's boutique, his dignity having been hung out to dry and his clothes in the corner as he struggled to get some garters clipped into place to hold his stockings up

Fuck his life

Seriously, just fuck his life

He was going to murder Scott for this, he swore

 _"It's for charity Stiles!"_ he had said

 _"It's for the animals Stiles!"_ he had insisted

 _"Just do it for the puppies Stiles!"_ he had begged

He really didn't know what made Scott think they even _needed_ Stiles' scrawny ass when they had a bunch of gods and goddesses already doing the show

Hell Scott and Lydia alone could probably sell out the entire house

"Easy for him to say," he grumbled as he bent down and buckled the straps on his heels into place

"Fucking beefcake steroid werewolf..."

Looking in the mirror, he tried valiantly not to shudder in displeasure at what he saw, rubbing his arm anxiously as he looked at the white, blue, and gold lingerie currently adorning his body

Now he just needed to go out and have Lydia lace up the corset so he could make sure it fit...

Sucking in a deep breath and praying to whatever god would hear him that the other faeries were already gone, he reluctantly pulled the door to the changing room open and stepped out....... and collided with the chest of the most beautifull man Stiles had ever seen

Stumbling back, the faery's face turned as red as a cherry as he stared up at an equally red looking... uh... person....- species to be determined- with green-hazel eyes, jet black hair, and a thick and beautifull beard

He was wearing a burgundy sweater with thumb holes in it

_Adorable_

"Oh my god are you another faery!?" he shreiked at the top of his lungs

The guy just shrank back a little, a deeply concerned look on his face as he stared at Stiles and took a slow step back

"No...? I'm... a werewolf actually... but you probably shouldn't be shouting that kind of thing in a public place..."

Oh great, another werewolf, that made sense, and that was all the world needed, another smoldering hot sex-wolf strutting his stuff down a runway and making Stiles look like even more of a pancake than he already did

GREAT

"So, another werewolf model then?"

Perfect

"What? No! I'm not- ... I'm not a _model_ , I mean, thanks, I guess, but I'm not-"

"You're.... not.... a model....?"

Oh no

Oh _no_

"No, I'm here to pick up a Christmas gift for my sister's girlfreind, my sister was supposed to get it today but she got stuck late at work,"

.............................................

Wow, time to die

"I'm supposed to talk to Lydia, any idea where she is?"

"Um...."

From a dressing room across the boutique, there was a shreik that sounded like a corset being pulled too tightly, and Stiles determined that Lydia was likely doing _that_

"....She may be indisposed at the moment...."

"Great...." the werewolf sighed miserably, pinching the bridge of his nose

And then, because no one ever said that Stiles was _smart_ , he did the dumbest thing he possibly could have

"Uhh... I mean I could get whatever it is for you I guess... is it already paid for?"

"Yeah, Laura ordered it a month ago, Lydia said it's behind the counter with her name on it,"

Stiles nodded shakily and started out of the dressing room, his eyes on the counter, clearly trying to distract himself from Sexy McHot Wolf as the gorgeous creature followed right behind him

Oh God, _behind him_ , he could see Stiles' ass in these stupid fucking panties....

Stiles wondered if he could convince one of the other faeries to kill him if he pissed them off enough....

"So... nice lingerie...."

It didn't sound like sarcasm, it actually sounded... genuine... somehow....

"Thanks," Stiles mumbled under his breath, slipping behind the counter, face still red, and trying to search for the aforementioned package

"Y-Yeah..... what's it... for...?"

"Ummm.... to promote the boutique and help animals in need Lydia and our freind Scott are doing this 'lingerie for charity' thing on Saturday night, they're selling tickets, it's gonna be held here, all the money goes to the local animal shelter and they're even adopting out some of the dogs and cats on the spot,"

"Are they?" the stranger mused slowly as he leaned over the counter, watching Stiles rustle around under the counter for a moment before finally emerging with a gift-wrapped box, the name "Laura Hale" printed neatly on a tag hanging off of the ribbon

"Um, your sister is Laura Hale I take it?"

"That's her,"

Stiles just nodded, muttering a "Here you go" as he passed the box across the counter

"Thanks," the stranger said slowly, earning another slow, stilted nod from the faery

"So.... what time-"

_"Stiles! Come here and let me lace that!"_

Stiles had never in his life felt so thankfull for Lydia's voice, giving a quick "Gotta go, see ya' later!" to the werewolf at the counter before rushing off in the direction of Lydia's voice

So, _that_ had officially been the most embarrassing experience of Stiles' entire life

But he would get himself to sleep tonight under the fact that there was no way in all of heaven, hell, and earth, that he would ever see Hot Werewolf Guy again

Wow, the universe really loved to prove him wrong

~+~

Incidentally, the- what Stiles hesitated to call- fashion show didn't go that badly

Yes, Stiles was left feely constantly inadiquit because he was surrounded by beautifull and non-human creatures who constantly raked in extra money when they got to the end of the stage and asked politely for extra donations to the shelter, but all in all things actually went pretty well

Several of the animals were adopted, they made a good bit of money, and atleast a few people donated when Stiles asked them to

By the sheer grace of God, he didn't even fall when he went walking down the runway in heels

_Amazing_

By the time the show was over and he was able to change out of the lingerie and into some actual _normal_ clothing, he was pleased to find that the boutique was almost entirely empty save for those who were involved in the show, a few of them still sticking around for whatever reasons

All in all it was probably a success and Stiles could get on with his life, feel good about himself for helping innocent animals when he went Christmas shopping tommorrow

That would be a weight off of his shoulders

Unfortunately though, as he left the dressing room and started for the door, he realized that the people left in the boutique weren't limited to other people who had worked on the show like he initially thought

"Hi,"

_Oh holy god it was Sexy McHot Wolf_

....

And he was holding a puppy

.......

Someone in the world just wanted to see Stiles suffer, didn't they?

"Uhh.... hi...?"

"Um... look I-... I wanted to thank you for telling me about the adoption event," Sexy McHot Wolf said, his face a little pink as the puppy in his arms squirmed a little to get more comfortable

"I've been meaning to adopt for a wile and just... needed the push I guess..."

"Yeah? Well uh, you're welcome! I'm really glad you ended up with a furry freind here," Stiles grinned back, offering a thumb's up to the stranger, who just anxiously smiled back

"I am too, and since I wouldn't have found out about this without you... well..... I'd love to take you to dinner sometime,"

Stiles' mouth was practically on the floor

Before he could respond- wich would probably have been made up of incoherent dieing animal noises- the werewolf reached out and handed Stiles a crumpled up peice of papper

"I really should get Kara home now but... really... let me take you out? ...Call me,"

Stiles looked down at the papper just long enough to confirm that it wasn't a horrible prank- "Derek Hale" along with a phone number were written on the papper, so he was going to venture a guess and say "probably not a prank"- before looking up and being met with nothing but an empty place in front of him where Derek had once stood

"See?" Lydia hummed as she stepped up behind Stiles and set a hand on his shoulder

"I told you you weren't all that unattractive,"


End file.
